If you find yourself in love with someone who does not love you, be gentle with yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. Love just didn’t choose to rest in the other person’s heart.

If you find someone else in love with you and you don’t love her/him, feel honoured that love came and called at your door, but gently refuse the gift you cannot return. Do not take advantage, do not cause pain.

How you deal with love is how you deal with you, and all our hearts feel the same pains and joys, even ifour lives and ways are different.

If you fall in love with another, and he/she falls in love with you, and then love chooses to leave, do not try to reclaim it or to assess blame, Let it go. There is a reason and there is a meaning. You will know in time.

Remember that you don’t choose love. Love chooses you.

All you can really do is accept it for all its mystery when it comes into your life. Feel the way it fills you to overflowing, then reach out and give it away.

Give it back to the person who brought it alive in you. Give it to others who deem it poor in spirit. Give it to the world around you in anyway you can.

This is where many lovers go wrong. Having been so long without love, they understand love only as a need.

They see their hearts as empty places that will be filled by love, and they begin to look at love as something that flows to them rather than from them.

The first blush of new love is filled to overflowing, but as their love cools, they revert to seeing theirlove as need. They cease to be someone who generates love and instead become someone who seeks love.

They forget that the secret of love is that it is a gift, and that it can be made to grow only by giving it away.

Remember this, and keep it to your heart. Love has its own time, its own seasons, and its own reason for coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it, or reason it into saying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you.

But if it chooses to leave from your heart or from the heart of your lover, there is nothing you can do and there is nothing you should do. Love always has been and always will be a mystery.

Be glad that it came to live for a moment in your life.

Don’t deny love just only you don’t want to be hurt…

How does one avoid loss in the first place? Contrary to popular belief, it’s not ‘attachment’ that causes loss - attachment feels fine. It’s the ‘detachment’ that hurts. Learn to let go.

Some suggest that to avoid loss, one should never be attached to anything. They give the example of a hand in the water: when the hand is removed from the water, the hand leaves no impression. These people say the hand leaves no trace in the water is because the water is not attached to the hand.

On the contrary, while the hand is in the water,it is ‘very’ attached to the hand. It surrounds it, enfolds it, embrace it. Allow yourself to experience life as fully as water experiences the hand, then let go as completely as water.

Yes, the water leaves a little of itself on the departing hand, as we leave a little of ourselves with the people and things we touch, but for the most part, when it comes time to go, let go.

The hand could no more hold the water than the water could hold the hand. As soon as one “wants” to leave, there is no attachment, because there can be no attachment other than the mutual action of being together. Hand and water both accept the inevitability, and part “clean.”

There is a title for a book on raising the children we’ve always liked: ‘Hold Them Very Close, and Let Them Go.’ This we find good advice for all experiences, whatever they may be: Hold them very close, and let them go.

How do you know when it’s time to hold them close? When they’re in front of you (often literally): Whatever is the current experience in your awareness, the next event on your schedule. When is it time to let go? When you’re on your way out of they’re on their way out.

Say good-bye, let go, and embrace the new moment.

(Source: imsolostwithoutyou)